Reluctant Habits » Photo Headlines

Hillary Introduces Last Minute Ventriloquist Act to Woo Voters; Not Enough Dinero in Campaign Funds for Dummy

Edward Champion — Thu, 22 May 2008 18:57:28 +0000

Bush Vows to Keep Human Costs Out of Gaze

Edward Champion — Fri, 09 Nov 2007 16:37:17 +0000

Here’s the full set of photos.

Chancellor Angela Merkel Announces New “License to Kill Leftists” Program

Edward Champion — Thu, 08 Mar 2007 19:22:57 +0000

Learning from Previous Disaster, Bush Ditches Guitar for Two Girls

Edward Champion — Sat, 03 Mar 2007 19:19:51 +0000

Hillary More Concerned with Camera Profile Than Potential Voter; Father Pleads for Return of Stunned Infant

Edward Champion — Wed, 21 Feb 2007 23:36:41 +0000

Dubya Begins “Presidential Book Club” with Vanity Press Title; Washington Insiders Remain Skeptical

Edward Champion — Mon, 05 Feb 2007 20:56:34 +0000

Pelosi Becomes Speaker; Issues OK for Comedians to Make Fun of Liberals Again

Edward Champion — Fri, 05 Jan 2007 01:08:38 +0000

Sony’s Ken Kutaragi Promises to Bankrupt American Families With Needlessly Expensive Xmas Gift

Edward Champion — Tue, 14 Nov 2006 01:10:00 +0000

Daughter Loses Promised Pony for Xmas, Something About Dad Losing His Job

Edward Champion — Wed, 08 Nov 2006 19:36:12 +0000

Katherine Harris Considers “Getting Nelson’s Little Dog Too” During Florida Senate Debate

Edward Champion — Thu, 02 Nov 2006 00:59:24 +0000

Lacking Knife, Bush Attempts to Carve Jack O’Lantern With Idiotic Stare

Edward Champion — Thu, 19 Oct 2006 22:25:51 +0000

Insert Caption Here

Edward Champion — Sat, 14 Oct 2006 00:10:15 +0000

Police Confuses Alec Baldwin With Younger Brother Stephen, Alec Uses Glengarry Speech to Pass Line Without Success

Edward Champion — Thu, 12 Oct 2006 02:04:11 +0000

Bush Reveals Margin of Difference Between Iraq Deaths Caused By His Administration and Deaths from Darfur Massacre

Edward Champion — Wed, 11 Oct 2006 18:28:43 +0000

Prime Minister Android Halts One Year Before Projected Shutdown

Edward Champion — Wed, 04 Oct 2006 23:10:21 +0000

White House Launches “A Tree Grows in Baghdad” Campaign to Raise Spirits Before Midterm Elections

Edward Champion — Fri, 15 Sep 2006 22:04:44 +0000

Chertoff Uses Incomprehensible Charts to Justify “Outdated” Status of the Fourth Amendment

Edward Champion — Wed, 23 Aug 2006 21:00:26 +0000

Solider, Eager to “Use Up Remaining Minutes,” Ignores Chopper Filled with Yahoos Heading to Bomb Village

Edward Champion — Tue, 15 Aug 2006 00:10:18 +0000

Tony Blair Continues Long Legacy of Supporting Roles

Edward Champion — Tue, 01 Aug 2006 22:15:04 +0000

The Situation in Cuba

Edward Champion — Tue, 01 Aug 2006 14:18:36 +0000

Meterologists Reduced to “Laughing and Pointing” at Weather, Hoping Global Warming Will Go Away

Edward Champion — Fri, 28 Jul 2006 19:56:15 +0000

The Exact Moment Floyd Landis’s Life Started Cycling Downhill

Edward Champion — Thu, 27 Jul 2006 23:51:36 +0000

Al-Maliki Reacquaints Bush with Handshake to Prevent Further Backrub Mishaps

Edward Champion — Tue, 25 Jul 2006 17:45:34 +0000

After 742nd Attempt, Bush Yields Baby Smile After Sneaking Paxil Into Bottle

Edward Champion — Wed, 19 Jul 2006 20:45:40 +0000

McCartney Declares Himself “Needed & Fed” at 64, Demands an End to Sgt. Pepper Jokes

Edward Champion — Mon, 19 Jun 2006 06:03:27 +0000

Scott McClellan Fired by Bush; Told He Wasn’t Enough of a Slimy Liar; Replaced by Unemployed Sock Puppet

Edward Champion — Wed, 19 Apr 2006 17:56:59 +0000

RELATED: Vanity Fair profile: “In McClellan’s case, almost all of his sentences are dead on arrival. Even the pre-written sentences (most every briefing begins with a statement about the president’s schedule or the plausibly positive developments at hand—we’ve turned the corner in Iraq, etc.) are so bald and flat-footed that they become a kind of insult—he doesn’t disguise the bull.”

Pope Benedict Unveils New Palpatine Look to Lure Youths to Catholicism

Edward Champion — Fri, 14 Apr 2006 22:28:13 +0000

Bush, Facing Record Low Approval Ratings, Stands Under Chandelier, Hoping Bulbs Will Give Him “Idea”

Edward Champion — Tue, 28 Mar 2006 01:00:08 +0000

Rumsfeld Reveals Prototype for Forthcoming Mandatory Salute to U.S. President

Edward Champion — Fri, 24 Mar 2006 01:15:55 +0000

Singer Michael Feinstein Has Cardiac Arrest While Selling Soul During Valentine’s Day Dinner Fundraiser

Edward Champion — Wed, 15 Feb 2006 20:17:45 +0000