Author / DrMabuse

by DrMabuse

Hemon Revisited

In arrears with hot potatoes, we had a number of things to say about last year’s Aleksandar Hemon/Operation Homecoming contretemps that had begun at Lizzie’s and GalleyCat’s. But our damn browser crashed and a 1,000 word post was lost into the ether. We’ll only say that, having finally gotten around to reading Hemon, The Question of Bruno is a fantastic achievement and that the NEA’s history of censorship pressured by reactionary forces does back up Hemon’s claims to some extent, even if it fails to account for the strange machinations of government in general. Our basic point was this: The difference between Crouch and Hemon is that the former is a pugilist looking for a fight, while the latter remains an idealist pining for a certain faith in honest government. Is this such a bad thing to argue for in these corrupt times?

Back to the salt mines, where trout are being fished out of agua with stunning alacrity.

by DrMabuse

Irvine Welsh’s Pride and Prejudice

That Darcy bloke won’t give me a fag. Crusty polite little bugger. Hangs out with Bingley sometimes, but the man needs a drink. Several, in fact. I’d like to see Darcy loosen up a bit, maybe light under the foil and inhale Great God’s fine smoke.

The odd thing is that Darcy’s so polite. He should be some cunt hosting a late night teevee show or cringing at the thought of using a public restroom. I’d like to see that uptight bugger fetch for his suppository.

What kills me is that one of Bingley’s sisters actually fancies him. Wouldn’t stop going on about his penmanship. The prim cunt ignored her.

– You fuckin shite, I said, – how many fuckin birds care enough to fuckin pay attention to your fuckin handwriting? For fuck sake, she gets enough fuckin hell from Elizabeth. Are you fuckin listening?

Darcy said nothing, though he took a liking to Elizabeth. The poor fuck was badly in need of a shagging and could only do so through legitimate marriage.

See, that’s the kind of sad case Darcy was. I’d hoped he’d piss off and find a proper place in the suburbs where he wouldn’t plug a finger up our miserable Scottish arseholes.

by DrMabuse

Boringcakes

Heather Harvrilesky has the perfect response to a passive long-distance relationship:

This is how you find the man/woman of your dreams, stupids: You refuse to waste time on the man/woman of your loneliness-fueled spreadsheets. And if you can’t get worked up over anyone… well, Jesus, what is wrong with you? Can you get worked up over anything at all? Here in LA, lots of people wax romantic about movies, but when it comes to their real lives, they’re fucking numb and alienated and don’t see the raw thrill, the breathtaking drama of every little minute. Blahblahblah boringcakes, motherfuckers! The girl who made you your coffee this morning has beautiful green eyes, and she paints weird portraits of her customers and keeps chocolate and rope stashed in her nightstand and she reads books about gardening and she knows what she wants. You could spend the next two months in bed, honkwinders, getting tied up and eating chocolate and watching old movies in the middle of the night. You could be swooning and sighing and feeling like the world is opening up like a flower. So why are you watching “Survivor” with that guy who bores the shit out of you, and pisses you off, and doesn’t give a flying fuck about how you feel, ever, and mostly just wants you to get to the point and stop crying? Why are you heating up canned soup and wondering about the long-term viability of negotiating a reasonably satisfying coexistence with someone 3,000 miles away?

by DrMabuse

Guantanamo Bay — An Internment Camp in the Making

It’s bad enough that FBI agents willfully witnessed prisoners being abused at Guantanamo Bay. Because we all know that when you see a human being getting a lit cigarette stuck into his ear, the immediate thing to do is to stand and do nothing while the vultures continue to beat the guy down further. Horrible enough that the suspected “terrorists” held at Guantanamo Bay have little to no evidence and that these people are being denied due process. But even Richard Lugar is against the latest scam to leave suspects there for life, even when there’s nothing to back up the government’s claims. Funny how it comes down to chump changehelping out Sri Lanka while the Defense Department sees no problem blowing $25 million for Camp 6, a prison designed for “more comfort and freedom than they have now.” Spokesman Bryan Whitman said, “This has been evolutionary.” On the contrary. It’s downright recidivist, if you ask me.

Here are some of the highlights:

  • A British detainee was tortured using “strappado.” Strappado was commonly used in Latin American dictatorships and involves hanging a prisoner from the bars by his handcuffs until they cut deeply into his wrists. What was his offense? He was caught reciting the Koran while talking was banned.
  • David Hicks, an Australian citizen was beaten before, during and after interrogations, threatened with firearms and other weapons, and was hit in the face, head, feet, and torso with hands, fists, various objects and rifle butts. Over one eight-hour session, the man was handcuffed and blindfolded and hit randomly with a group of other detainees. Hicks was also offered the services of a prostitute if he agreed to spy on other detainees.
  • Another detainee is on the verge of madness. His physical condition is deteriorating and his father is concerned that he will turn into a cabbage before his appeal goes before the U.S. Supreme Court.
  • Between October and December 2003, FBI reports document that detainees were subjected to sleep deprivation, humiliation, and forced nudity.
  • The FBI memos have been provided by the ACLU.