It’s silly enough that this blog has a possessive before it’s name. But you’d never catch me claiming authorship for something this anachronistic. REiD Mihalko’s Cuddle Party is Susie Bright cross-pollinated with the Quirkyalone movement. In other words, it’s self-defeating nomenclature, a downright oxymoron, from the get-go. For one thing, there’s the problem of the modifier. Cuddling is nice, sure. But “cuddle” implies 8-year-old girls getting intimate with an oversized stuffed giraffe. It is not, shall we say, a place to bust out the bottle of Cuervo, start dancing like it’s 1999, and blast Technotronic’s “Pump Up the Jam.” So why party? Perhaps “cuddle gathering” or “feel-up frolic” or “casual groping” would have been more apposite.

Who the hell is REiD Mihalko? Apparently a bi-coastal Sex and Romance Coach who was (I’m not making this up) given the gift by his mother “of seeing and treating woman [sic] as sacred.” In other words, he’s one of those unemployed, guitar-playing guys you meet at a coffeehouse who claim that they’re as sensitive and gooey as a jelly donut, but have the closet desire to feel you up.

At least that’s the impression I’ll draw.

I’m all for cuddling. But this whole thing sounds like it’s one step removed from bukkake. I mean, what’s the difference between being groped by some stranger on a subway and allowing some dude you don’t know to grope you, with the queasy bonus of some guy moderating who doesn’t know how to use capital letters?

(via Gawker)

The 2004 Lyttle Lytton winners have been announced. The goal? To write the worst opening line in 25 words or less. The winner: “This is the story of your mom’s life.” (via MeFi)

I hope Messr. Teachout pardons my late notice. He is, after all, a man with an inveterate Red Bull addiction (now confirmed through the three investigators I have tailing him).

Average Number of Bloggers TT Has Lunch With Per Day: 2.1
Average Number of Words TT Writes Per Day: 7,500
Number of Books TT Will Publish in 2005: 5
Odds That Commentary Will Be Renamed The Teachout Times: 2 to 1.

And if that wasn’t enough, Mr. Teachout was on Kurt Andersen’s Studio 360 over the weekend. I listened to the show last night. Good stuff. Check it out.

Kingston University has nabbed more than 1,000 books that belonged to Iris Murdoch, along with notes, letters and original manuscripts. The books contain numerous marginalia, and should help future scholars tie in Murdoch’s philosophy with her novels.

If you’re an American army deserter heading for Canada, Heather Mallick has some helpful (and detailed) tips on how to settle down. Her advice even stems into the cultural: “Recycle like you mean it. Read Fire and Ice by pollster Michael Adams about how Canadians are growing ever more different from Americans. Then read Margaret Atwood and Doug Coupland, shop at Roots, stop in at Tim Hortons for a pile of Timbits on your way to your plumbing class. Arrive in a Prius or a Smart Car, which shouts, ‘I care about the environment,’ and you, short Buddhist, are a shoo-in for citizenship.”