Contents of Box
- A yellow legal-sized writing pad containing mysterious ideas and plans.
- An issue of Mike Hampton’s Hot Zombie Chicks.
- Minidisc case reading “Babbling — Raw #7. Also, The Babbling Project #1.” (No minidisc.)
- Minidisc case reading “1. Babble 2 6/6/00.” (No minidisc.)
- Mindisc (with case) reading “Babbling #8.”
- Y adapter for telephone line.
- Minidisc case — scratched and unmarked. (No minidisc.)
- Floppy disk with label scratching out Intellipoint driver, reading “ME — Startup.”
- Floppy disk (unmarked, unlabeled).
- Various audiocassettes from November 2004 containing interviews that I conducted to research a still unfinished polyamory play.
- Minidisc, with case reading “The Babbling Project #2.”
- Blue Sharpie
- Box of Bostich No. 10 1000 mini staples
- Unlabeled green floppy disk
- Floppy disk reading “Creative stuff began @ work I”
- Damaged minidisc with Chet Atkins and mysterious “Test 7/21/00” label.
- Blue Pocket Etch A Sketch
- CD — containing driver for Olympus digital camera I no longer own.
- Unusued Ampex magnetic tape still in shrink wrap.
- 3M Recording Tape containing audio for uncompleted film.
- Many business cards.
- Many mysterious microcassettes — what’s on them?
- An incomplete San Francisco Secondary Schools Pass.
- A minicomic — Melina Mena’s Sour Milk Sea.
- A 2004 monthly calendar designed by my friend Tom Working.
- A strange package containing an adaptation cable for a video card that was fried sometime in 2005.
- A small bottle of Advil PM. (It’s still good! The expiration date is 10/09.)
- Many 3×5 index cards.
- A red Bostitch mini stapler.
- Many VHS videotapes containing (among many movies) Soapdish, episodes of the animated Star Trek series, episodes of Blake’s 7, Freddy’s Dead: The Final Nightmare, episodes of Doctor Who and Monty Python, Twelve Angry Men, Sullivan’s Travels, Miracle Mile, episodes of The Simpsons, episodes of The Prisoner, Quick Change, an HBO special starring Rowan Atkinson, Suspiria, and Poison Ivy (recorded, no doubt, because of the promise of Sara Gilbert and Drew Barrymore naked).
- A pair of red scissors.
- A small journal I had forgotten about that contains the sentence, written in 1999, “I am slightly fearful of being laced with Judeo-Christian nonsense.”
- A CD containing photos of a play I wrote and directed many years ago for a small venue.
- An additional CD containing the sound cues for Wrestling an Alligator.
- A mysterious 5 1/4″ floppy — what’s on it? how to transfer?
- Numerous writing instruments.
- An unopened box containing a corner brace — 1-1/2 in. x 3/4 in.
- A student ID from 1991 in which I actually had hair.
- A Swingline package containing 5,000 standard staples.
- A floppy labeled, “YES! 4/97 Job Search.”
- A floppy labeled, “Servant of Society.”
- A receipt from Stacey’s Bookstore, dated 05/04/07, for Bleak House. (I still haven’t finished that book.)
- The Fat Camille Omnibus 2007 by Camille Offenbach.
- Another minicomic: Nitsy and Bitsy.
- A CD labeled “80s MP3s.” (Shudder.)
- An undeveloped roll of Fujicolor film from who knows when. (What pictures are on this?)
- Julia Wertz’s I Saw You…: Missed Connection Comics #1.
- A handout for an improv class that I took in 2005.
- A handout from MUNI on “Ballpark Service Tickets and Fares.
- A spare serial drive cable.
- 2 AA batteries — still good?
- A UHU STIC gluestick.
- Many DV tapes — containing what?
- Two VGA to DFI adapters.
- Printout of Segundo scheduling spreadsheet from 2006.
- 16mm yellow leader tape.
Most of this will probably be thrown away. But unfortunately, I’m too curious about the data that might be on some of these tapes. I’m additionally curious as to where I obtained some of this stuff. This curiosity, I suppose, is the problem with moving. When setting up in the new digs, I will likely expend a considerable amount of time trying to find a use for nearly everything on this list.
Ancient Job Evaluation Report
Employee: Ed Champion
Strong Points
- Flexible with hours and volunteers for evening and daytime overtime when available
- Recently demonstrated a willingness to help others in the office
- Willing to take criticism and improve
- Knows WP and Excel well
- Tasks are completed timely
- Good at staying in contact with attorneys
Points for Improvement
- Interactions with some people are defensive and prickly; needs to work on improving working relationships
- Pay better attention to detail, proofread work, do filing promptly
- Prioritize and delegate when appropriate
- Needs to focus on ______ work between 9 and 5:30
- Interrupts without showing courtesy to those in conversation
- Slow down and listen to instructions
- Show initiation in taking on new assignments or projects
Goals
- Keep work to a consistent level throughout the year
- Improve communications skills and relationships
Overall Performance Results: Meets Expectations
These are all good points for improvement, some of them still applicable. But at the risk of coming across as “defensive and prickly,” I should observe that my “defensive and prickly” interactions largely involved one attorney who took a good deal of his time to speak to me in a condescending tone about tasks that any well-trained monkey could perform. He did this over and over because his life was miserable, and he wanted to make other lives miserable. (And he did. But he has not yet made partner.) This may likewise explain the point suggesting that I needed to “slow down and listen to instructions.”
The Summer Digitalization Project
While moving, I located an astonishing number of videotapes and audiotapes entailing both film and journalistic work that I did in the 1990s — some of which I had completely forgotten about, some of which I never got around to turning into profile pieces. Since many of these tapes are just on the cusp of deterioration, my current plan is to convert everything I can to digital. Interviews that I conducted in the ’90’s will be converted into future Segundo podcasts. And films that I made as a younger and more naive man will be converted to digital, with the edits improved, the audio remastered, and the video dropouts cleaned up. This is not a George Lucas-style revisionism. I plan to keep the same music cues (many of them are quite dated), retain the essential visual structure of these films, and avoid any AfterEffects manipulation of the visuals. But I may rerecord a few of the vocal tracks, particularly those in which the audio is somewhat muddled. And for some of the projects that I never finished, I may incorporate some newer footage to see if I can come up with some final product that is worthwhile, while attempting to adhere to the spirit in which these projects were launched.
This project will take many months. But I will offer intermittent reports on how things are progressing. I’m doing this largely because I’m dissatisfied at leaving all this work in such piss-poor shape, with much of it unfinished. I wrote a good deal of journalism during those days and much of it has now vanished. I made a number of films during those days — many of them projected on screens in San Francisco cellars for the enjoyment of many audiences — and I want to put all this in some final location. So in a sense, this preservation project will allow me to offer a better approximation of that period in my life, while likewise fueling my present energies into the future.
More as things develop.
Message Back to R. McCrum: We’ll Keep on Bloggin’
Syntax of Things: “Did I miss the seminar or not read the pamphlet that listed the qualifications of responsible book reviewing? Damn, I’ll have to Google around for it. Then again, it could be that it’s written in invisible ink on the back of the hand that feeds everyone this crap and calls it a gourmet meal. Highly responsible for what? Here at Syntax of Things, we are highly responsible and possibly, in the eyes of outgoing literary editors for major newspapers, highly contemptible for reading books published by a former quality-control manager for a car-parts manufacturer. AND ENJOYING THEM, TELLING YOU ABOUT THEM, AND BRINGING RUIN TO THE SACRED EMPIRES.”