Asimov’s somehow emerged as a magazine choice in a school fundraising drive. But one mother flipped through the magazine and was “shocked” to read about “young girls with no panties, young girls in white socks, young girls looking at his wank-mags with him, young girls doing it with one another while he watched.” What pisses me off about this is not only does Ms. Suburban Mom miss the point about what spec-fic is about, but that this perpetuates the impression that spec-fic is nothing less than stories about bug-eyed monsters and gender domination. A quick glance through the collected works of Urusula K. Le Guin, Octavia Butler or Margaret Atwood (the latter having escaped the “science fiction” ghettoization) shows that it’s a lot more than this. And if Ms. Suburban Mom can rally against the “naughty” qualities of spec-fic, how dare she remain silent about the sexuality expressed on magazine covers, television commercials, album covers, advertisements that eroticize children, and the like. Fuck the yokels in Grandville, MI. And fuck ’em hard.

The New York Times interviews Anne Tyler by e-mail. Amazingly, she characterizes her work as “truthful.” Hey, Anne, I’ve got your truthful right here. It’s called five figures a year. Apparently, Tyler’s based in Baltimore these days. If that’s the case, please, Hag, beat some sense into her.

Following up on the Jacqueline Wilson news, the Guardian has the top 100 borrowed books in the UK up. It’s not inspiring.

Well, fuck me, the Globe has tried to examine “fuck” without mentioning it.

Cinemorgue: Easily one of the most disturbing sites I’ve ever encountered.

Rashomon’s been asking bloggers what their top 10 albums to take on a desert island are. Here’s my ten (at least right now in my present quasi-bronchitis mood, and discounting classical):

1. Johnny Cash, At Folsom Prison
2. Bob Dylan, Blonde on Blonde
3. Janis Joplin, Cheap Thrills
4. Jurassic 5, Quality Control
5. The Kinks, Something Else by the Kinks
6. Miles Davis, A Kind of Blue
7. Minor Threat, Complete Discography
8. Nirvana, Bleach
9. Sly and the Family Stone, Fresh
10. The Who, Tommy
10. Hank Williams, The Complete Hank Williams

7:15 PM: Meeting Coordinator Alice Koon let down the gavel, deferring floor to President Horace Henrietta Woosey (hereinafter “HHW”), who slid the curtain (meager partition to be replaced with available funds from till; note to self: cost benefits analysis) and called meeting to order.

7:17 PM: Till noted to be $4.37 for month. Detailed accounting to be taken up at next meeting.

7:18 PM: Alfalfa (not real name, but sobriquet he prefers) had not arrived with organic nonfat snacks. Cell phone reception was poor, confirmed unavilable by Sprint PCS, T-Mobile and AT&T Wireless. HHW went outside, trying to call Alfalfa. Koon carried out roll.

Attendees: Horace Henrietta Woosey (not present at roll, but present @ 7:15 PM and likely to be present approx. 7:22 PM), Alice Koon, Milagro Sanchez (self/secretary), unnamed bearded gentleman who declined to reveal name (unless “I’m here for the free food” is legitimate answer; the Secretary leaves future scholars to make the distinction between declaration and Christian/surname shenanigans).

May Arrive: Alfalfa (real name not to be jotted in lodger)

7:21 PM: Estimation correct. Secretary pats back without anyone noticing. HHW returns. Alfalfa on way.

7:22 PM: Paper of Record (hereinafter referred to as “Lady of Off-Black Hue,” aka “LoO-BH”) presented to Society. HHW asks if all attendees had read it. 3-1. Free Food Man declined to vote. Counted as nay to add exciting plurality.

7:23 PM: Alfalfa arrives with food. Dried fruit is not organic. Koon calls for Alfalfa’s temporary explusion, declined. HHW notes that all snacks are nonfat. Alfalfa would have subcommittee on his rear end if he violated dichotomous snack conditions. But he has only overlooked one. Free Food Man grabs package, sets up in back of room.

7:25 PM: Daniel Okrant’s Week in Review column discussed. Has Okrant gone off deep end? Koon adds testimony to record: she received call from (212) 557- prefix last week, man initially breathing into phone with “obscene fortitude” and then claiming to be LoO-BH reporter. Koon provided necessary information, but notes that Okrant singles out ancillary prefix. HHW notes that all email has gone unanswered and that average length (according to Powerpoint data) is 23 words.

7:31 PM: Free Food Man deposits empty package into collections box, asks for more food. Koon consults Robert’s Rules of Order, sees no precedent. Free Food Man persuaded to sit down after given second package of dried fruit.

7:40 PM: Additional discussion about Radosh deal, as addressed by LoO-BH’s Corrections column. Is Peter Landesman legit reporter? HHW adds to record that Landesman threatened financial and professional ruin to Radosh and that current till amounts to $4.37, not enough for a retainer agreement. Koon makes note to look for “ACLU type” who will take on Society’s legal defense pro bono should Landesman find out that Society is discussing his article, Landesman call Alfalfa on cell with harsh language and threats, et al.

7:42 PM: Free Food Man, stirred by Landesman discussion, offers to be Society’s “bodyguard” and brawl with Landesman (or anyone else) should he hinder society business. Free Food Man (now identifiying himself as “Dennis”) then places a $100 bill into till and vows to attend every meeting. Dennis’s intervention offers nice segue away from dangerous Landesman topic. Dennis is inducted. HHW calls for vote on whether Society Funds should go to three month gym membership. 4-0 in favor.

7:45 PM: Meeting adjourned. Aside: Dennis has nice pecs.

Since Sarah did some digging, I became a bit curious myself. The following review has a very similar feel to McSweeney’s house style. Is it from Eggers?

From “A reader from San Francisco, CA,” February 6, 2004, four stars, for Vendela Vida’s And Now You Can Go:

Unlike some close-minded readers, I found the premise of basing an entire novel around one incident fascinating and was hooked after the first page. However, it was El’s dry wit and sharp, detailed observations that I quickly found I could laugh out loud at and even identify with. The often sarcastic and self-deprecating tone kept me chuckling, even at seemingly serious, inappropriate moments. Unexpected moments like that are what make a story truly stand out to me. This is a terrific first novel that keeps up a swift, satisfying pace, which kept me up, finishing the book late in the night.

I recommend this highly to those who are open to examining a potentially harrowing incident from a fresh, and often very witty, perspective.

[REASONS IT MIGHT BE EGGERS: The obvious reason: Vida is Eggers’ wife. And given how protective he was towards Julavits, he’ll be tenfold so to his main honey. The short-hand reference to “El” instead of “Ellis,” implies greater attention to detail. There’s the implication that other readers are “close-minded” (deliberately misspelled?). The follow-up phrasing, which is very much like Eggers: “and even identify with.” The annoying McSweeney’s modifiers: “often,” “seemingly” and the like. The deliberately awkward phrasing: “Unexpected moments like that are what make a story truly stand out to me” instead of “These unexpected moments made the story stand out.” The extraneous Eggers-like clause after “kept me up” (which already implies that the “reader” stayed up all night).]