Maud Newton: “My friend John was taking a leak in a public restroom once when a deranged woman appeared out of nowhere and grabbed his cock.”
I can certainly relate to Maud’s experience. My own skirmishes with weirdness are legendary, but then you might say I’m often the Pied Piper for weird people, attracting them like field mice. The hell of it is that not one small town has yet offered a commission.
There is a baby — a celebrity baby — that apparently nobody can refrain from talking about, speculating upon, offering conjecture, remarking on the photo’s authenticity (or lack thereof), gauging the baby’s patrilineage, the like.
This is all very nice. And it has all probably sold a good deal of magazines and provided a lot of water cooler conversation. If this gets you through a rough day, I can understand. If contemplating upon this baby’s provenance is what you need to prevent yourself from applying a mace to your boss’s skull, that’s okay. I’d rather see you engage in tawdry gossip over violence.
But I plan to boycott the baby. There are approximately six billion things in the universe that are more important.
I beseech you for the sake of humanity to do the same.
The New Republic: “After an investigation, The New Republic has determined that the comments in our Talkback section defending Lee Siegel’s articles and blog under the username ‘sprezzatura’ were produced with Siegel’s participation. We deeply regret misleading our readers. Lee Siegel’s blog will no longer be published by TNR, and he has been suspended from writing for the magazine. — Franklin Foer”
New York Times: “The RadioShack Corporation, the electronics retailer, has followed through on plans to cut about 400 jobs, but it has been put on the defensive because of its decision to notify laid-off employees by e-mail….’The work force reduction notification is currently in progress,’ the notice stated. ‘Unfortunately your position is one that has been eliminated.'”
Cold bastards.