Not too long ago, I attended a quiet party (and wrote about my experience and lost a 3,000 word post about this). My basic conclusion was that a quiet party involved the same principles as a meat market. My wit, my esoteric references and my sonnets (in true meter!) were lost upon the women who I was “flirting” with via 3×5 cards. They wanted more declarative sentences and debauchery. Well, fair enough. But I had a good time and somehow managed to finagle a date out of it.

Now, however, I think I’ve found a dating alternative in which I may have a distinct advantage: literary speed dating. Although it’s a bit criminal to have only six minutes (well, more like two or three really, given that there’s another person) to discuss William Gaddis’s The Recognition. It’s not unlike the Summarize Proust Competition. In fact, some of the dateless participants mght indeed have “masturbation” as a hobby! (via Sarvas)

Moby Lives Radio has shifted to a taut weekly format, and has introduced a new regular feature called “Men, Men, Men” (complete with backing choir) that looks at the leading literary publications (The New Yorker, the NYRoB, et al.) and discerns how many contributors are women. The results, unfortunately, aren’t promising.

Go to Rice University and spill the beans on Box 43, Folder 1!

Radosh has the scoop. Apparently, the ULA’s ability to detect charlatans only applies in hindsight. (via Number One Hit Song)

Incidentally, the ULA cache claims that the source came from edrants. But I should point out that it was the imposter who identified himself as “Nasdijj” who left a comment, not me.

In the meantime, to prove that I am not a demi-puppet, I publicly challenge King Wenclas to talk about these inconsistencies and other issues on The Bat Segundo Show, if he dares. King, if you’re out there, you know my email. If so, drop me your phone #. Do you have what it takes to tango with the Bat?

…but…

• Large Hearted Boy offers a Book Notes installment with Ander Monson.
• We’ve been declared poison by the Morning News, but we point out the Tournament of Books all the same. No clue on when it starts, but the books and readers lineup look spiffy.
• The SFist talks with Of Montreal’s Kevin Barnes.
• Are there too many books by journalists?
• Think Progress has been thoroughly debunking last night’s SotU speech. Not that it will do a lot of good.
• Jack Bauer is a Democrat? Given the way he kills and manipulates, I’d say he’s a Lieberman Democrat.
• Tarkovsky on Tolstoy.
• What’s worse? Cell phone rambling or Garrison Keillor rambling? A strong case can be made for the latter.
• No more telegrams from Western Union.
• You learn something new every day: William Vollmann’s middle name is Trevor.