Tabling the Issue

when i woke up this morning
i was confronted with the news that although we’d make a boatload of money touring, i wouldn’t be able to buy that table at crate and barrel because the album was released to the internet
i won’t make as much $$$
and that will break my heart
it will break john frusciante’s heart
it will break anthony kiedis’s heart
and it will break the heart of chad smith
we all wanted a nice table to set the bong on
and now we can’t
because you downloaded it
yes, we worked for seven years hoping that we could buy that table at crate and barrel
i have wanted this table for seven years
can you blame me for crying?
it is a painful pill to swallow
not having this table
we have released tracks in crappy itunes format
but let me bitch to you about how bad it will sound
and how i will not be able to buy my table

yes, you have prevented the red hot chilli peppers from buying a new table
how can you live with yourself?
who was the idiot who prevented me from buying my precious table?

i am sad for i will have to use the ikea table for another two years
what if i have a heart attack?
what if anthony kiedis has a heart attack?
the crate and barrel table was good for us
if we fell on it while having a heart attack
it would cushion us a bit more

please see us live three times



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One Comment

  1. There was an article recently written by some audio engineers and quite well-known producers that basically concluded that a 128 KB aac file was impossible to distinguish from the original CD. They did dozens of tests listening on the best studio equipment in the world – audio set-ups that cost literally millions of dollars. So I have to call BS on artists whining that somehow the digital copy is “crappy” or “doesn’t sound as good.”
    Now, it’s true most folks have a stock soundcard that will make things sound like crap, or cheap iPod headphones or whatever, but that is their equipment – not “crappy iTunes format” as The-only-multimillionaire-named-Flea suggests. People who are into music are likely to have upgraded components – including a high-end soundcard. I know I do. It’s just like having a better stereo back in the day. Sure, the masses will not bother, but let’s say they go by the CD instead of downloading songs. What are the vast majority going to listen to that CD on? Some jacked-up Best Buy car stereo or maybe some crappy bookshelf CD player or whatever. It’s not going to be like a huge improvement and these “artists” will still “suffer” because each and every note will not sound exactly as they agonized over. So anyhow, I get offended by that argument.
    And I will go see a band live as long as they are not playing some terrible $60 a ticket+ Ticketmaster-sponsored show in some arena. Talk about crappy sound! Hypocrites.

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