Time Was, George Will’s Syndicated Content for the Midwest Fostered Folksy Generalizations ‘Bout Ol’ Readin’ News

George Will: “Time was, books were the primary means of knowing things. Now most people learn most things visually, from the graphic presentation of immediately, effortlessly accessible pictures.”

GEORGE WILL: “Sheet, boss, you see dat ALA survey? Not nobody be reading no more.”

GEORGE WILL’S EDITOR: “Yeehaw! You’re darn tootin’. Who need dem books? Hey, Georgie, why not write a piece wi’ some of dem rash generalizations. You’re due a column, aintcher?”

GEORGE WILL: “Well, boss, you and I’ze know dats true. And I been lax o’ late. And I’m shures youze understand. I reckon I never learned no nothing from dem books.”

GEORGE WILL’S EDITOR: “Footnotes, sources, dem stuff’s worthless, right? Ain’t nobody pay no attention to scholarship.”

GEORGE WILL: “I reckon. No real mind anyhows.”

GEORGE WILL’S EDITOR: “All visual, like dat issue of Archie where Jughead’s laughing his teenage butt off after Archie falls on his butt.”

GEORGE WILL: “Oh, dat shure was funny.”

GEORGE WILL’S EDITOR: “Reckon you got 750 words dere.”

GEORGE WILL: “On Archie?”

GEORGE WILL’S EDITOR: “No, dang it, boy! Readin’! Easy. Say sumpin’ bout Dickens. You might wanta ask Ol’ Jack Bedford up the hill. He know lotsa stuff. He read. He give you sumpin’ if you give him a dollah.”

GEORGE WILL: “A dollah? Really? Darn tootin!”

GEORGE WILL’S EDITOR: “Maybe sumpin’ bout Roosevelt or World War II.”

GEORGE WILL: “Youza sharp one, boss! The piece will write itself!”