[EDITOR'S NOTE: At the California State University, Chico, several philosophy majors, preparing for their spring break excursion, devised the following syllogisms to justify their boorish behavior.]
What’s good for the soul is healthy.
Getting wildly drunk is good for the soul.
Therefore, getting wildly drunk is healthy.
An unfortunate occurrence is something you can get over.
Urinating in one’s pants is an unfortunate occurrence.
Therefore, urinating in one’s pants is something you can get over.
Wearing a thong bikini is a pain in the ass.
A pain in the ass is a bit sexy.
Therefore, wearing a thong bikini is a bit sexy.
Wanton unprotected sex is quite pleasurable.
Anything quite pleasurable is probably a good idea.
Therefore, wanton unprotected sex is probably a good idea.
Flashing random strangers is a form of self-expression.
Any form of self-expression is noble.
Therefore, flashing random strangers is noble.
No is a gray area between yes and no.
A gray area between yes and no means yes.
Therefore, no means yes.
The Call by Yannick Murphy: The always interesting author of Here They Come and Signed, Mata Hari returns with a novel that whips up a worldview from a rather quirky set of limitations: namely, the call logs that a veterinarian maintains as his son is unexpectedly put into a coma and an unforgiving economy denies him work. What emerges is a surprisingly optimistic, often funny, and very moving account on how one family uses acceptance and forgiveness as a way to atone for hard knocks. (
Birds of Paradise by Diana Abu-Jaber: Forget Franzen and Eugenides. If you're looking for a social novel that counts, Diana Abu-Jaber is the author you're looking for. Building from the free-form exploration of consciousness and identity in Crescent and the gripping procedural structure of Origin, Abu-Jaber's latest novel is her finest, equally fluent with gutterpunk culture and smarmy real estate men. It has been suggested by The Washington Post's Ron Charles that you will likely gain some pounds while reading this novel. This is certainly true. Abu-Jaber's description of food is so precise that it often made me want to do more cooking. But I very much admired the way in which Abu-Jaber presents all her characters as unwitting victims of rough capitalism, which permits them some dignity even as they perform terrible acts.
The Last of the Live Nude Girls by Sheila McClear: This memoir isn't so much about the decline of the Times Square peepshow, as it is about one young woman's efforts to pull herself up by by her bootstraps when presented with few economic options. Filled with self-introspective candor and a quiet dignity, McClear's story is one that might befall any of us in these volatile times. While McClear does get back on her feet, her book leads one contemplating the terrible fates of other young women now moving to New York and falling into deadlier vocations. (