Thomas Harris: The Laziest Titler in the Publishing Industry
Written byPosted on September 18, 2006
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Today’s big news: Thomas Harris has turned out another Hannibal book, just in time for the holidays. I’ll keep my thoughts on Mr. Harris’s books to myself. There is something more troubling at work here.
The new book is called Hannibal Rising — this after the imaginatively titled Hannibal.
Was ever there an author more lazier with his titles? Where other authors might give you titles like Special Topics in Calamity Physics or I Feel Bad About My Neck, words that make us curious about the inner contents, Mr. Harris has decided upon Hannibal and Hannibal Rising.
Well, I don’t believe it’s too late. And, as a public service to Delacorte Press, I offer the following titular alternatives:
- Bride of Hannibal
- Revenge of Hannibal
- Hannibal Strikes Again
- Son of Hannibal
- It Came From Hannibal
- The Amazing Adventures of Hannibal & Hannibal
- Hannibal X
- Just When You Thought It Was Safe: Hannibal
- The Hannibal That Wouldn’t Die
- Hannibal: Season of the Witch
- Fishing with Hannibal
- The Cook, The Thief, His Wife & Hannibal
- Hannibal, Hannibal
- The Night of the Living Hannibal
- Putting the Nib in Hannibal
- Hannibal: Dream Warriors
- Hannibal II: Electric Boogaloo
- I Ate Out With Hannibal and All I Got Was This Lousy T-Shirt
- Hannibal, How About You?
- My Dinner With Hannibal
- Hannibal’s Marauders
- Hannibal Disco Derby
- Hannibal Will Be 25 in the Year 2000
- Hannibal: Not the Cannibal You Were Expecting
- Hannibal, American Style
- The Good, The Bad & The Hannibal
- I Once Knew a Cannibal Called Hannibal
- Once, Twice, Three Times a Hannibal
- Hannibal Cordon Bleu
- Crouching Tiger, Hidden Hannibal
- Hannibal, Too
- I Have No Hannibal and I Must Eat
- Hannibal: The Early Years
- Hannibal on Handball
- Hannibal If You Love Jesus
- Hannibal Takes Manhattan
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Books To Jump Up and Down Over
Beyond Heaving Bosoms by Sarah Wendell and Candy Tan. The famed writers behind Smart Bitches, Trashy Books have written a very funny and thoughtful volume about romances, both Old Skool and New Skool. Here is a book that any smug and humorless literary manboy beating his flabby passive chest over Banville or Bolano should probably read pronto, if only for the distant possibility that he might get over himself. While the Choose Your Own Adventure segment at the end caused me to have a very disturbing dream involving Shelley Long (don't ask), Sarah and Candy did have me rethinking many of my own misperceptions when I wasn't busy laughing. They're not afraid to take on the New York Times Bok Review or even the groupthink within certain sectors of the romance community.
Alice Fantastic by Maggie Estep. This wild and highly enjoyable narrative involves two sisters (presumably, the third one was still being rented out by Chekhov), a hippie ex-junkie mother who lives with seventeen dogs, a murder, gambling, and libidinous Hollywood actresses who live in Woodstock. But this is the wonderful Maggie Estep we're talking here. And what seems at first like a quirky yarn becomes something unexpectedly moving about connectivity. What I love about Estep's work is the way that she'll juxtapose an extremely astute observation (now that you mention it, why do cab drivers always have somebody to talk with on the phone past midnight?) with an often outrageous story development.
Generosity by Richard Powers. It doesn't come out until September 29th, but Richard Powers's latest will have anyone committed to books reconsidering their literary fervor. I foresee some animosity from the vanilla critics hostile to idea-driven novels, but book bloggers, YouTube chroniclers, and MFAs would do well to plunge into this chance-taking narrative, which introduces vital questions about what the reader's relationship is with media, scientific dissection, and "creative nonfiction." Are we rats fleeing to happy cities? Or can we find the humanism within the purported plague?
Pieces for the Left Hand by J. Robert Lennon. Lennon is one of the most underrated fiction writers working today. Much as On the Night Plain proved that Lennon had a lot more in the toolbox than heartfelt (and often very funny) suburban satire, this slim but fascinating volume juxtaposes 100 small-town anecdotes -- arranged by category -- in a manner that reads, at times, like Nicholson Baker's passions for minutiae and, at other times, Stewart O'Nan's concern for psychological detail. The result is fiction that makes us wonder about whether one person's subjective view of particulars can entirely be trusted. This book never found a publisher in 2005. But thankfully, Graywolf has released it in the United States, along with Lennon's latest novel, The Castle.
Wonderful World by Javier Calvo. This wonderfully raucous volume has been completely ignored by the Washington Post, the New York Times, and the Los Angeles Times. But it's probably one of the most delightful reading experiences I've had this year. Calvo cavalierly mashes up multiple genres and manages to mix up familial subtext with larger-than-life, almost cartoonish characters. (Indeed, one might argue that one mobster's penis is a character of its own in this sprawling novel.). This is not an easy thing to pull off, but Calvo makes it work. And it's helped immeasurably by Mara Faye Lethem's idiom-specific translation. (See longer post.)
The Means of Reproduction, Michelle Goldberg This thoughtful book tackles the complicated (and little discussed) subject of reproductive rights from numerous angles, which includes a number of unpleasant but necessary ones. The upshot is that there isn't a quick fix solution for declining birth rates and fundamentalist abuses. Just about every political faction has contributed to the friction. But you'll want to read this book anyway to refamiliarize yourself with the topic, but also to understand just what's occurred during the past several decades to get us where we are today. (See also podcast interview with Goldberg.)
Contact Ed by email.
Or send materials to:
315 Flatbush Avenue, #231
Brooklyn, NY 11217
Or send materials to:
315 Flatbush Avenue, #231
Brooklyn, NY 11217
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Not to mention the obvious ones:
- Special Topics In Hannibal Physics
- I Feel Hannibal About My Neck
Don’t forget Hannibal Two: Electric Boogaloo.
In all fairness to him (which is not something I’m sure he deserves after Hannibal, or the few dreadful chapters I actually managed to read), isn’t it possible that the publisher had a hand in the title? With Hannibal, the title told readers more or less everything they needed to know: “Remember that character from the author’s other books? More to the point, remember Anthony Hopkins’ portrayal of him? Wasn’t that creepy? Well here he is, in his own book. It’s like the others, but only more so!” Hannibal Rising may not be quite as spot-on — unless the book involves a high-speed hot-air-balloon chase — but it’s not the most unoriginal I’ve heard.
The Silence of the Lambs is fairly original, at least as titles go…
Good ones. These were going through my head as I read yours.
Extremely Close, Incredibly Hannibal.
Two Hannibals, Fat and Thin
Searching for Hannibal Hannibal
A Farewell to Hannibal
To Hannibal or Have Not Hannibal
Are You Gonna Finish That?
What about:
The Curious Incident of the Hannibal in the Night
The Emperors Hannibal
I can’t believe no one has suggested Hannibals on a Plane.
Hannibal Farm.
What about that guy, what does all those “Rabbit [verb]” titles?
Well, okay, if we’re just going for silly alternates, than I have to toss out “National Lampoon’s Hannibal House”.
Here Comes Hannibal
It’s Fucking Hannibal, Stupid
The Adventures of Hannibal Across the 8th Dimension
I can’t believe no one listed ” Hannibal Farm”!
oops!
I was a teenage Hannibal
I was a teenage Hannibal for the FBI
The Life and Opinions of Hannibal Lecter, Gentleman
Shakespeare was worse: Henry IV, Part I; Henry the IV, Part I; Henry V . . . Never had a Willy or a Sam!
hannibal does dallas