I Love the Smell of Right-Wing Media Consolidation in the Morning

The Business: “Rupert Murdoch has succeeded with his $5 billion bid for Dow Jones, owners of the Wall Street Journal, according to sources acting for the Dow Jones board. Negotiations have been completed and the board is confident the terms of the deal will be accepted by the Bancroft family, which controls a majority of voting shares in Dow Jones, over the next few days. A formal announcement is expected next week.”

Does this mean we’ll see Bill O’Reilly’s web column in the Wall Street Journal now?

A deal, incidentally, has not yet been reached.

_________ Is/Are Killing the Novel

Here’s a helpful list for New York freelancers who need to write a needlessly alarmist newspaper piece about what may be killing the novel. So if you’ve run out of ideas and don’t quite know an angle, here are some casuistic ideas for your future pitches! Remember, if you collect a check from any of these ideas, I’m only asking 5%. Be sure to send a check to me within 45 days after the piece runs. Good luck and Allah’s speed!

  • Global warming
  • David Hasselhoff
  • Sudoku puzzles
  • People who are really into Settlers of Catan
  • Tao Lin
  • The bottled water industry
  • Right-wing French joggers
  • Waffles and pancakes
  • Men who leave the toilet seat up
  • Women who leave the toilet seat up
  • Pet dogs who have been trained by their masters to keep the toilet seat up with their paws
  • Marxists
  • Eucharists
  • Tom Cruise (or any famous Scientologist, really)
  • Eco-friendly organic pizzeria owners
  • Pot smokers
  • Golfers
  • Matt and Daniel Mendelsohn
  • Lev and Austin Grossman
  • Edward Champion
  • Killroy

Attention to Correspondents

I have been receiving letters sent to my address from people hoping to reach Norman Mailer and a few other authors. I am not Norman Mailer. Nor do I have any way of contacting Mr. Mailer. I am Edward Champion. I’m just some bastard with a blog who happens to interview authors. If you hope to reach an author, please direct your correspondence to the publishers. Not me. Thank you.

Google Maps Street View: Deplorable Exploration

I’ve had reservations about the Google Maps Street View option — similar to Annalee’s objections. But I offer one more: Where’s the sense of adventure? Part of the fun in having a vague idea about where you’re going is that you get the opportunity to explore a neighborhood you don’t know, discovering places, people, and details that you might not otherwise have known about. What of the wandering impulses that Rebecca Solnit has written extensively about? The street corners where one can stand for about an hour and simply listen? The way that one can walk into a bodega and ask a random stranger about the neighborhood? (The latter rhetorical question assumes that the explorer is not a jaded misanthrope.)

It’s bad enough that Google Maps has become the ipso facto reference point to meeting up with someone. Much like Google itself, we willingly abdicate our memory banks to Google Maps, which has all the answers. We follow the directions and, if we’re in a rush, we might immediately forget the street names, little realizing that there might be a history to these streets or an enchanting public place few know about to be found behind a set of doors.

Now with the Street View option, Google has granted us the option of pre-judging a particular neighborhood and it diminishes this sense of mystery. A random snapshot, which doesn’t necessarily reflect the neighborhood at its best or its worst, determines whether one should go out and explore it.

It’s precisely because of these reasons that I’ll be avoiding the Street View option whenever possible. While a picture can certainly reveal visual qualities, it is by no means truly representative of a location’s complexities. And some things in life simply aren’t meant to be discovered exclusively from a laptop.

Roundup

  • National Review: “One promising development in the culture today is that mainstream critics are more and more growing tired of postmodern fiction.” Actually, this is not promising at all. This is, in fact, a serious problem that runs counter to literature’s natural developments as a form. I will have a lengthy post on this subject in the not too distant future. (via The Valve)
  • If you enjoyed Austin Grossman’s appearance on The Bat Segundo Show, he also chatted with Rick Kleffel.
  • It hasn’t been mentioned by anyone other than Tod Goldberg, but it appears that the New York Post is axing its book coverage.
  • Vlad the Impaler’s castle is now for sale. In an effort to respect “the property and its history,” prospective buyers are being asked to demonstrate their bloodletting talents before closing escrow. (via Slushpile)
  • Book artist Gloria Helfgott has passed on. (via Ron Silliman)
  • I’m a few episodes into the third series of Doctor Who. But with the horrible news of Catherine Tate returning, as well as Kylie Minogue appearing (what the fuck?), in future episodes, I fear the worst. Pardon me if I go all geeky on you, but I’m convinced that Freema Agyeman is one of the best things that has happened to the show. Here we have a strong female character who is educated, curious, and who takes action when she needs to, instead of standing doe-eyed and helpless — as Rose often did — marveling at the Doctor’s genius. That it would take so long for the show’s producers to rectify this dated gender imbalance to the program is bad enough. But it would appear that Agyeman will be returning in the middle of the fourth season. The message here? Russell T. Davies and company like their companions dumb and helpless, instead of smart and kickass. (via Ready Steady Blog)
  • Yes, “inhaling” is really the only way to describe reading Sarah Waters’s books. But think of it this way. Better to snort crafty narratives up your nasal lining than Bolivian marching powder.
  • I don’t care for Sarkozy very much, but I think it’s pretty damn silly to declare jogging a right-wing activity. Outside of Leni Riefenstahl’s Olympia, since when did exercise have any political agenda? Besides, if you really want to get right down to it, were I blessed with a bountiful expendable income, I’d expect a personal trainer to demand that I exercise hard rather than have him pat me on the back and offer an Alan Alda-like hug if I couldn’t make my crunch count. If you want to get rid of flab, you have to do the work. Does doing the work make one a Nazi? More from Josh Glenn.
  • Personally, I feel “devastated” that so many words were devoted to J.K. Rowling feeling “devastated.” Next up: a series of 2,000 word Rowling profiles in the Telegraph about how Rowling feels “almost euphoric,” “less than stellar,” “pretty darn okay,” and “just peachy keen.”
  • What the Dallas Morning News layoffs mean for the paper. (via book/daddy)
  • The Heritage Book Shop has closed. (via Bookninja)
  • Hamlet translated into modern English. (via Books, Words & Writing)
  • Armistead Maupin on why he loves San Francisco. (via Colleen)