Year / 2004

by DrMabuse

Woof Woof

Taking a cue from Hilary Clinton, Cherie Blair is set to write a memoir. In an effort to upstage Hilary’s infamous response-to-Monica in Living History and spawn sales, Blair will depict husband Tony as “a wild stallion who isn’t bad in bed, I’ll have you know. You should see the way he undulates.” Unfortunately, the memoir won’t attempt to explain why Tony Blair transforms into a lapdog whenever he visits Kennebunkport.

Something to ponder over on Monday, unless you’re an Evan Machem fan: A new study reports that schools are almost as segregated today as they were back in 1969. A new study by the Harvard Civil Rights Project reports that the percentage of blacks attending predominantly white schools has fallen to 30%.

An article from Gould’s Book of Fish author Richard Flanagan has helped to spawn a letter writing campaign to save the Tasmanian forests.

Sad news for anyone who’s ever collected twelve inches. The CD single’s to be phased out in three years. The hunt for quirky tracks and strange mixes will go the way of the dodo. Or possibly Dido.

by DrMabuse

Conversation with a Fellow Customer

“Security. Does wonders for the mind.”

He set down his bottle, which he paid with a twenty.

“Really?” I asked. “How so?”

“Well, for starters, there’s the discipline.”

“Discipline?”

“Yeah. Ain’t no job try your patience. I be doing this seven years.”

“What do you do on the job?”

“Stand round, lookin’ wise. Not much trouble. See, they hires us ’cause they thinks they got something. But they don’t. Nothing important. Nothing I see. Nothing no one, no man steal. Know what I’m sayin’?”

“Yeah.”

“Just ’bout any one get this kinda work. Show up. Stick around, few weeks they make you supervisor. All in the attitude.”

He collected his change.

“And this is good for the mind?”

“Oh yeah. Real good. Keepin’ it real. Keeps you tight.”

“Doesn’t it get boring?”

“Sometimes. Yeah. But it’s good for the mind, wonders, see. I see most folks cut out quick. Real quick. They the ones got small minds. The real ones hang in. Damn easy. If the mind keeps going, shit, you get supervisor pay. Twelve dollars an hour.”

“So your mind’s in this for the money.”

“Hell yeah. Who ain’t? Gets me cab fare sometimes. Some folks don’t know pay when they hang in there.”

by DrMabuse

The New Twilight Zone on DVD

TV Shows on DVD reports that The New Twilight Zone (the edgy 1985 version, not its recent incarnation) may be hitting DVD in July 2004. I’ve contacted Image Entertainment. Nick, in the Public Relations department, says that he’s “heard about this.” But it remains unconfirmed. I’ve left a voicemail with Cindy Barrow, the attorney who handles the legal contracts, to see if I can get confirmation on this. If I hear anything back from her, I will report it here.

by DrMabuse

Hustle Cussler Outta There

Clive Cussler has sued a production company over an unauthorized script. My hope is that he wins. Not because of the suit’s merits (or lack thereof), mind you, but a quiet $10 million payoff may stop Cussler from writing novels. That would be a truly philanthropic act.

More on Rushdie. He’s got a movie deal lined up. The Firebird’s Nest is a romance between an older man and a younger gal (even starring Rushdie’s girlfriend, a younger gal), but this is not — repeat, not — based on Rushdie’s life. (via Bookslut)

Ken Kesey’s 1967 jail journal will be published. It includes “two dozen color plates of collages Kesey made from ink drawings entwined with his handwritten reflections laid down in notebooks smuggled out by a buddy who got busted with him.”

The Elegant Variation demolishes the 2 Blowhards’ movie/book people argument (in fine satirical form, natch): “By the way, do you notice that (at least based on the movie people we know), he hasn?t really described your average movie person, but rather your average video store geek? And I?m willing to bet that if he?d been seated beside Tarantino at a dinner party before he?d made it big, he?d have found him an annoying little pest.”

Nell Freudenberger has compelling words of wisdom: “But then, ignorance is no excuse. It?s obvious to me now that you can do a terrible thing by accident.” Yes indeed. There are lots of things you can do by accident. Such as turning in a silly Yank-centric piece to Granta without so much as a major observation on Laotian culture, history or behavior. The essay, ironically enough, is part of Granta‘s “Over There: How Americans See the World” theme. But I’ll take J. Robert Lennon’s goofy piece over Freudenberger’s any day. Paula Fox has a essay up too, but you’ll have to pony up the clamshells for the hard copy.

And Rachel Greenwald believes that you can snag a husband with a push-up bra. But she fails to account for the fact that some men (myself included) assess the goods (if they can be called that or given a pronoun) naked and in private, conditions when said boobies are unhindered by faux, painful support, and that boobies, while spiffy, are a fringe benefit, rather than the chief draw. (via Sarah)