“You Have a Good Voice for TV and Radio”

What American accent do you have?

Your Result: The Midland
 

“You have a Midland accent” is just another way of saying “you don’t have an accent.” You probably are from the Midland (Pennsylvania, southern Ohio, southern Indiana, southern Illinois, and Missouri) but then for all we know you could be from Florida or Charleston or one of those big southern cities like Atlanta or Dallas. You have a good voice for TV and radio.

The Northeast
 
The Inland North
 
Philadelphia
 
Boston
 
The West
 
The South
 
North Central
 
What American accent do you have?
Quiz Created on GoToQuiz

(via Books Inq.)

Today in AMS (1/10/07)

  • As Galleycat reported this morning, reporter Peg Brickley has noted the following: On Monday, AMS is now seeking the Delaware Bankruptcy Court’s permission to sell itself or refinance its senior debt. The senior debt, of course, is the $220 million that is owed to publishers. Should the Court provide AMS permission, this would permit them to raise additional monies to pay off the existing debt, converting the debt into equity. But it remains to be seen whether AMS’s proposed plan would involve a swift revenue return to the indie publishers now left in the lurch or one that could go on indefinitely, as AMS attempts to raise its cash through a sale. It is also unknown whether AMS would seek protection from its creditors under the current bankruptcy plan. Either way, this setback isn’t good news for the Q4 2006 revenues now owed to publishers. As previously reported, a creditor’s committee meeting is scheduled for this Friday. So hopefully we’ll have some more information by the end of the week on whether there are any developments on the senior debt.
  • There’s been some discussion by PW readers on this issue. Tom Haworth writes, “”One would think that Publishers would keep better track of the financial condition of a company that had not produced a legitimate quarterly or annual report for the past 3 years. The financial arm of all piublishers [sic] need to be more up to speed with the deals the sales and marketing arms are making. It’s easy to say that AMS’ customer are so big and strong that we must continue to pursue this business. But, one must remind the publishers that these companies (Costco, Sam’s and BJ’s) assume very little if any risk in dealing with AMS.”
  • “Best coverage” or not, there’s been nothing else from the conspicuously silent PW on the purported “sources” who claimed that AMS was looking to unload PGW on a seller. So I’m going to have dismiss PW‘s report as rumormongering until they can come up with something concrete.
  • The bankruptcy attorneys stand to make a killing.
  • Mr. Popman announces, “I TOLD YOU SO!” and offers a few thoughts on why he saw the AMS bankruptcy coming.
  • Levi Asher offers a personal comparison to the AMS bankruptcy.
  • This Ain’t Livin’ believes that this spells out the end of an era.
  • For those interested in the early PGW culture, Pat Holt offered a remembrance in January 2002. Of PGW co-founder Charlie Winton (now head of Avalon), who was replaced as President and CEO in favor of Rich Freese in July 2003, Holt writes, “And Winton did more: He delivered regular payment to cash-poor independent publishers who were accustomed to being the last vendor to be paid; he made it easy for independent booksellers to buy from a wide array of books without drowning in paperwork; he got orders for books from chain bookstores that would never have considered listening to a sales pitch from the smaller presses; and he established an in-house department to help independents with deadlines, editing and book design.” My, how times change! It’s worth noting that Holt expressed great reservations about the AMS sale, noting that AMS was “the opposite of PGW.”
  • More on Winton from 2002: “As for the acquisition’s effect on publishers and the culture, it’s been a while since the sky-is-falling crowd really had anything to stew about–you might have to go as far back as B&N-Ingram–so if nothing else, Winton gave them some fodder. The argument: that Winton’s damn-the-torpedoes attitude–he was known for carrying publishers and books he liked even when their numbers were questionable–won’t fly with corporate bosses that just paid $37.3 million in an tight market.”
  • And for those who wish to examine AMS’s SEC filings, you can find them here. Today’s filing? An issuance of common stock at $0.001 per share, filed by Foundation Resource Management, Inc. Is this the equity AMS hopes to raise to pay off its senior debt? Is this a sign that the Delaware Bankruptcy Court approved Monday’s request?

Reasons Why I Won’t Read an Author

Justine Larbalestier lists some reasons why she won’t read certain writers. Well, fair is fair. Being of clean hands and sound disposition, I thought it might be helpful to offer a few hard rules of my own:

  • If the author turns out a 2,000 page book and follows it up with a small chapbook, then I am convinced that the 2,000 page book was all the author had in him. Come on, Author! If you can write a 2,000 page book, certainly you can write at least a 300 page followup.
  • If I can imagine the writer having sex with Dudley Moore, no way, Jose. I won’t touch the author with a ten foot pole. I thought the short, belated comedian to be a talented man, but I get a very queasy feeling whenever I imagine him having carnal relations with a novelist. Granted, this association has only happened six times in my life.
  • If the author’s name forms an anagram reading “Cthulhu Sucks,” she doesn’t stand a chance.
  • The author’s name is Steve Almond.
  • If the author has tracked down my home address, stormed into my apartment when I’m away and hidden in my closet, only to duct tape me to my bed and tighten my testicles into a painful Dutch knot as I’m asleep, it’s safe to say that I’m likely to pass on the author’s future volumes.
  • I have a restraining order against the author.
  • If a publicist has sent me thirty-six copies of the author’s latest book, then I will put the author’s name on my Nixon-style Enemies List. At present time, the Enemies List consists of two names. And these two authors are no longer living.
  • The author insists on collecting a lock of my hair. (What hair?)
  • I won’t read authors who leave the toilet seat up.
  • I won’t read authors who fart at the dinner table. (And to determine if the author has, in fact, done this, I require three separate incidents, all reported by unimpeachable sources. I take into account the fart’s decibel level and its wind trajectory.)
  • I won’t read authors who send me manuscripts written in their own blood, urine or feces (particularly all three).
  • I might read an author who wants me to suck his cock, for I’m easily humbled. But if he forces me to go down on him or points a video camera at me as he asks me to go down on him, then I cannot read his work, for I will be reminded of his throbbing penis on every page.
  • I will not read an author if he feels that Lima beans are tasty.
  • I will not read him in a house, I will not read him here or there, I will not read him anywhere.

I hope you catch my drift.

So there you have it, readers. Clear transparency. That’ll show the mainstream media! I don’t think I’m being too unreasonable, do you?

Meanwhile, In Non-AMS News…

Today in AMS (1/9/07)

  • Another roundup from Galleycat, including this statement (PDF) issued yesterday by PGW President Rich Freese. Freese asserts that the publishers are the owners of the inventory in the Indianapolis warehouse and that he’s cutting COD checks for post-petition payments. (I don’t believe the first assertion was ever in question. Then again, it’s Freese’s ass against the wall.) Well, that’s great, Rich, but what about pre-petition payments? You know, those monies PGW owes the publishers from October, November, and December? Well, that’s where a motion filed on January 5th comes in. The motion hopes to give PGW publishes “Critical Vendor status” and pay out these amounts sometime this month. Even if this motion passes, however, this still doesn’t ensure that the monies paid out won’t be “pennies on the dollar” payments. Again, as I pointed out in my initial post, PGW is going to need a lot more than $75 million to handle that.
  • Meanwhile, Publishers Weekly has opened its doors to speculation on what can be done to change the current publishing industry model.
  • There’s still nothing concrete on yesterday’s PW rumor that AMS was planning to sell out PGW. If you have any leads, drop me an email.
  • Rachel Kramer Bussel reprints an email from Best Lesbian Erotica editor Tristan Taormino. In an effort to make up lost revenue, Cleis Press is offering a winter sale.
  • More on the Quarto setback, which appears not to be as severe as previously reported, from This is Money. Broker Collins Stewart has remarked that AMS was only 3% of Quarto’s total sales.
  • Meanwhile, former PGW employee Erica Mulkey writes: “I don’t know how I feel about this. It seemed inevitable, but what sucks is that yeah, PGW management has been weak and ineffective for a long time, at least since Mark Ouimet left, possibly since Charlie left, but PGW was essentially a Good Company. AMS (who bought PGW in 2001, or was it early 2002?) has been unprofessional and poorly managed to an unbelievable degree this whole time, and everyone knew it. Anytime AMS tried to interfere with PGW it was debacle after clusterfuck after shitstorm.”

Temporary Segundo Hiatus

Due to technical mishaps on our main workstation*, the Bat Segundo production schedule has been delayed. But have no fear: we expect to be back next week with fresh podcasts. There are some fantastic interviews coming up. And we’ve also landed a very special guest for Show #100. But we’ll leave you guessing as to who it is.

In the meantime, feel free to check out the backlist.

* — This also explains why we haven’t been able to answer our email.

Vidal & Cavett vs. Mailer

cavettmailer.jpgIt turns out that the Charlie Rose shows on Google Video are good for something. As an addendum to Boris Kachka’s Mailer enemies list, consider the following television history.

Rose interviews Cavett and plays an extended clip of the infamous Vidal-Mailer-Cavett showdown. It’s at the 29:18 mark. It starts as a smackdown between Vidal and Mailer, with New Yorker writer Janet Flanner also commenting upon the verbal melee. And then Mailer turns on Cavett and boasts of his giant intellect. Witness Cavett’s response. They don’t make television like this anymore.

Sorry, Charlie. You’re not one tenth the interviewer that Cavett was.

Introducing Wayne Chestnut, Father and Guest Blogger

[EDITOR’S NOTE: Here at Return of the Reluctant, we do our damnedest to keep on top of the latest literary trends. (Well, not really. We’re fundamentally lazy, but ideas are spawned nonetheless.) With Neal Pollack and Steve Almond now turning their hands to the heartwarming genre of “alternative” thirtysomethings who have spilled their seed and now feel compelled to splatter their paternal woes onto the page, we’ve recruited Wayne Chestnut, an MFA dropout who still harbors some dim hope of literary credibility, to drop in from time to time. Here is his first entry.]

Last night we put Jilly in front of the TV, something Elaine and I hope to do more often so that we can avoid real parenting and snort a few lines off the bedroom dresser mirror. Don’t get me wrong. I’m a very happy father, and I realize every day that within my child I can see things about the world that I haven’t seen before. Particularly if I’m stuck in a k-hole or if I’m in a bourbon-induced haze. Drugs are good this way. All parents should try them. Sometimes being a coked out asshole has its benefits. It gives you the strength to see beauty, and it gives you the beauty to have sleazy fantasies that go well beyond your parental responsibilities, which are just so fucking incredible. And if you’re not a parent, you simply cannot understand. It’s a bit like being gay.

I think of things like, “Holy shit! I have spawned and she’s so beautiful. And if I weren’t her dad, and she were a few years older, maybe she’d be a great fuck! How am I going to deal with her when she starts to develop into a woman? Will I then still be capable of an erection without Viagra?” You see, fatherhood isn’t nearly as banal as you think. Take that, Gawker!

chestnutyuppie.jpgSometimes I look into Jilly’s eyes and I find patterns. Sometimes she burps into my face, and it’s the timing of these burps that reveal good stocks to invest in. I then communicate these patterns to my broker. It’s a bit like that story I once read in a class, “The Rocking-Pony Winner.” Except the kid doesn’t die at the end. If Jilly keeps this up, then I should be able to retire before I’m 50.

But I’m sort of digressing, which is what you’re supposed to do in a blog. I’m a writer. I authored a book containing short stories, all of them about slacker protagonists who eat corn chips while listening to goth industrial. Every single story had that theme. So I know a few things.

Like I said, Jilly was in front of the television. It was a large television. A good flat-panel screen. The kind of television that only a family of three should invest in. I know this because this is what the man at Best Buy told me. I foresee a great future ahead, as Jilly becomes less cuter (the terrible threes, they call it, with lotsa temper tantrums) and I start to fool around on Elaine during my midlife crisis. But I’m a dad, first and foremost. And I’ll clean up any mess that Jilly pukes up before heading off to a clandestine appointment at the Days Inn. I’ll tell Elaine I’m working late and, if I’m feeling in a good mood, I’ll even do the dishes.

Anyway, where was I going with this?

I look at this television and realize every day that it’s probably a better parent than I am. And to think that it didn’t come out of a uterus! It was built by a bunch of guys at a factory. I have one channel and I have to sleep. The television has about 500 channels and it never sleeps.

Jilly will grow up seeing this television as better than me. And for what? Because I use it as a surrogate babysitter? Because I enjoy recreational drug use?

Well, maybe. But I’m the one who sired Jilly. Make no mistake.

AMS Bankruptcy Links (1/8/07)

  • There’s continuing coverage at Galleycat, with additional commentary from Sarah, as well as the effects of AMS’s bankruptcy on Quarto, a publisher that has suffered significant losses (to the tune of $1.5m in payments). More on Quarto here.
  • Additionally, Sarah has unearthed some considerable corruption within AMS over the years. I’m hoping to investigate this in more depth soon, but it appears that numerous AMS executives have been subject to SEC criminal charges since AMS purchased PGW.
  • ICV2 has more, reporting that AMS has had considerable legal expenses over the years: over $14 million in 2005 and $6 million in 2006 (although offering no sources for these figures).
  • Icarus Comics suggests that the AMS bankruptcy should serve as “a warning” and that Diamond, despite all the criticisms leveled its way, is an efficient and profitable distributor.
  • Charlie Anders suggests supporting publishers through alternatives (such as the magazines at McSweeney’s and Soft Skull’s fiction subscription).
  • The San Diego Business Journal tracks down AMS’ largest shareholder. The man’s name is Robert Robotti. His stock dropped from $3.4 million to $650,000 after the bankruptcy. That’s 7% of the outstanding stock. Robotti says that the bankruptcy move was the right decision. He would not reveal the steps in progress to preserve AMS, but it does involve selling the company.
  • Kathryn Cramer offers some analysis on why publishers were continuing to use AMS as a distributor when AMS had several executives cooking the books. It may be because of AMS’s near-exclusive access to the discount retailers. Cramer’s question is whether or not AMS held a monopoly in violation of the Sherman Antitrust Act.
  • But the biggest potential news comes from Publishers Weekly: AMS may be selling off PGW. PW says it has sources which suggest that there have been discussions along these lines, but until there’s more reliable information here (like PW offering a named source), this is mere conjecture.

You’re Seriously Asking Me for My View on “The English Patient?”

A good number of Charlie Rose interviews are now available through Google Video. (They had previously been available for $1.00 per view, but Google has since added video ads, making them free, and helpfully demarcated these ads through blue dots on the timeline.)

dfwcharlierose.jpgWhat this means, of course, is that the infamous DFW interview is now available. If you haven’t seen it, this is the interview in which Rose, who doesn’t seem to have read much of DFW’s work, asks DFW (wearing, believe it or not, a bandanna and shirtsleeves) about everything but his books. DFW comes in at the 23:17 mark.

It’s the telltale indicator of how low the literary journalism bar has fallen (compared with, say, the Dick Cavett shows of the 1970s, where Cavett or his researchers actually read the damn books) — a veritable train wreck and a true revelation of Rose’s illiteracy. A visibly uncomfortable DFW is bullied by questions that pertain to David Lynch, with Rose boasting about interviewing Lynch instead of talking about DFW’s work. Rose’s ignorance is astonishing, particularly as DFW educates Rose about the history of postmodern literature.

And this was only ten years ago.

[RELATED: Here’s Dave Eggers from 2000 (at the 25:38 mark), just as A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius became a success and in the early stages of developing the humorless temperament we all know him for today. Early on, Eggers remarks, “I thought [the title] would anger the right kind of people.” Eggers angering people? Who would have thought? That’s not what McSweeney’s is about!]

[MORE FUN: David Foster Wallace, Mark Leyner & a very young Jonathan “I consider myself my own reader” Franzen (1996, all interviewed at the same time, 36:26), Ian McEwan (2005), Toni Morrison (2003), David Halberstam & Bret Easton Ellis (1999), Ian McEwan (2003), Victor Navasky (2005), Jonathan Safran Foer (2002), John Updike (1998), Martin Amis & Gore Vidal (2003), Richard Ford (2005), John Updike (2003), and Jhumpa Lahiri (2003).]

Believe It or Not, There’s Someone Lazier Than Dave Itzkoff

What Jenny D said. It strikes me as anti-intellectual to waste time in a review bemoaning the length of a book (and in this case, it isn’t even the book being reviewed), and it reveals just how much of a mousy barnacle Allan Sloan is, who may very well be perfectly fit to report on business but is wholly incompetent to publish work in a book review section.

The other asinine statement from Sloan: “As with the Bible or Moby-Dick, you don’t have to be familiar with the entire work in order to grasp its essence.” What next from Tanenhaus? Championing SparkNotes over the text itself?

Apologists can defend Tanenhaus for his Whittaker Chambers biography all they want, but this kind of recidivist attitude has no place in a weekly book review section.

Absolutely no brownies for Tanenhaus. In fact, he should be baking us some.

As for the drive-by assault on Anthony Burgess (which comes courtesy of Paul Gray), the only thing “comfortably ho-hum” here is the flagrant vacuity within Mr. Gray’s head. Gray’s noggin clearly hasn’t entertained a curiosity about literature in quite some time.

Reason #142 Why Dave Itzkoff is a No-Nothing Assclown

New York Times: “All science fiction has some element of titillation — a strategy of taking known facts and stretching them to the limits of credulity, for the purposes of both entertaining and enlightening.”

Gee, I thought the purpose of speculative fiction was, much like many other novels, to provide a narrative that reflected the human condition: sometimes using provocative ideas or meticulous atmosphere (a la China Mieville) and, in the case of hard sf, sometimes employing rigorous scientific justification to explain the imaginative scenario (and thus pushing the narrative well past “the limits of credulity”) (a la Robert Charles Wilson’s excellent Hugo-award winning novel, Spin). That Itzkoff sees science fiction from a failed English major’s dichotomous mind set (“entertaining and enlightening,” but not challenging, humanist or literary) is a great indication that he should probably recuse himself from literary criticism. His work for the NYTBR reads like a Strom Thurmond-like politician trying to use States Rights Democratic Party rhetoric (circa 1948) to run for President in the 21st century.

[RELATED: Levi Asher points out that Tanenhaus’s team can’t even get basic Beat history right. Maybe they truly are operating as if it’s 1948 at the NYTBR.]

AMS Bankruptcy Links (1/6/2006)

Here are the most recent developments:

  • Some folks have a sense of humor about PGW.
  • Violet Blue has offered her thoughts on the meltdown, noting how the impact affects Cleis Press and pointing to a former AMS exec’s prison sentence. (The charge: falsifying earnings.)
  • Soft Skull’s Richard Nash puts the catastrophe in perspective.
  • Dan Wickett shares some ideas on how publishers might want to pick up some cash to make up for the lost revenue. The inspiration? An idea first put out there by Richard Nash.
  • Scrivener’s Error has a helpful legal breakdown. The news ain’t good.
  • Paul Collins: “Innumerable small publishers working with AMS and their subsidiary PGW — just about every good small publisher you’ve ever heard of — woke up in the street on New Year’s morning with their clothes missing and a pair of black eyes.”
  • No further news as of yet from the San Diego Union-Tribune, but I don’t think we’re going to see any major action until the creditors committee meeting on January 12.
  • I’m experiencing some technological issues with my main computer (hence, scant email replies from me for a while; apologies). But I’ll have more for you on Monday.
  • [Sunday morning item]: Nick Mamatas reveals some inside information. Soft Skull (and perhaps others) has held off on inventory until forming a short-term strategy. There was apparently a lengthy conference call with 55 publishers and 6 lawyers conducted on Friday. (I have confirmed with an independent source that there was indeed a conference call, with over 70 publishers represented.) The consensus was that these publishers decided to ship the books to the PGW Indianapolis warehouse, despite the risks, and hope that revenue would come right in. So we know that stock for some of the 150 publishers will continue to be offered for the time being. Let’s just hope that PGW will come through on the revenue front.
  • [Additional Sunday item]: Critical Mass observes that Pages Magazine was operated by AMS.

Malcolm Gladwell is the New Alvin Toffler

Maud tears Malcolm Gladwell a new one: “Does anyone else find it odd that a cultural critic would compare, with no apparent sense of irony, the activities of the Nazis with the financial maneuverings of corporations, in a free-market defense of the latter?”

Well, it’s my view that Malcolm Gladwell has always been about generalized arguments and deficient dichotomies. And if he keeps this up, in about ten years, his work will be as dated as Alvin Toffler’s is today. (I’m still waiting for Toffler’s paperless office and for “future shock” to kick in. Humans have proved remarkably adaptable as cell phones, the Internet, and manifold innovations have entered our collective existence.)

Book Standard Gutted

Publishers Weekly reports that Jerome Kramer, managing director of The Book Standard, has “left the company” (corporate parlance for shitcanned), along with two other Book Standard staffers, which Galleycat identifies as Patrick Eves and Kimberly Maul. The layoffs came “as part of an evaluation of VNU’s business portfolio.” Taking Kramer’s place will be Tracey Davies.

I’ve made my wisecracks about the Book Standard over the years (particularly towards Maul), but I do hope that Kramer, Eves and Maul land on their feet.

AMS Spin Cycle

The Gray Lady finally gets on the case, with reporter Julie Bosman speaking to an unnamed publishing executive. “The publishers are going to end up taking a huge loss,” says this executive. Also quoted in the article is Grove/Atlantic publisher Morgan Entrekin, who simply says, “It’s a mess” and who is reported as now being in something of a mad scramble. Entrekin has nothing more to say beyond these three words.

Okay, so the publishers aren’t talking (or at least going on the record with journalists). But I must quibble with this publishing executive’s asinine suggestion that “authors and readers were unlikely to be affected by the bankruptcy filing.” With AMS currently incapable of paying off their creditors, with a pennies-on-the-dollar turnaround at best, and with current AMS stock now being extricated from warehouses, it’s very likely you won’t be seeing independent books in stores anytime soon, until the publishers left in the lurch work out alternative distribution methods or guaranteed ways to earn current revenue. So readers looking for something different from, say, Laurell K. Hamilton and Mitch Albom are going to start seeing a difference.

And let’s consider the publishers, who are now in the process of bearing the financial brunt in ways that may very well go unreported. With reduced revenue coming in, it is unlikely that the affected publishers are going to be paying out advances to authors as they struggle to meet their operating expenses. Authors who are writing quirky or experimental books that don’t sell as well as the blockbusters often must go to independent presses to get their work published. But if the independent presses are hurting, then advances and acquiring new titles may be the least of the indie publishers’ cost concerns as this mess gets sorted out.

This morning, Publishers Weekly reported grimmer news, noting that the bankruptcy court is now in the process of granting the publishers access to the inventory. At the moment, access is now at the discretion of Judge Sontchi. A creditors committee meeting is now set for January 12, but with the creditors committee being comprised of the 20 largest creditors (i.e., the big publishers), it remains to be seen whether the precarious financial condition of indie presses will be taken into account by the committee.

Heidi MacDonald observes this morning that it remains unknown what distribution percentage Dark Horse had with PGW.

Sarah’s also investigating this, discovering this article that suggests financial inconsistencies on PGW’s part.

“Against the Day” Roundtable, Part Four

[NOTE: The discussion can also be followed at Metaxucafe. Previous installments: Part One (Max), Part Two (Carolyn) and Part Three (Megan).]

against4.jpgThe New Chums of Chance, aided by associative penchant and a perfervid desire to ferret out reference, continued their journey, hitting beyond Part One and, with Colonel Bud Parr beginning to see references to the Bible and Eliot, settling into the firm fields of Part Two:

“But after thy hardness and impenitent heart treasurest up unto thyself wrath against the day of wrath and revelation of the righteous judgment of God” (Romans 2:5)

My reading of Part 1, “The Light Over the Ranges,” and early Part 2, “Iceland Spar,” has me coming back to the idea of faith in all of its manifestations. Faith in the Old Testament sense of an apocalyptic fear; Faith in anarchism, Faith in science and technology; magic and pagan rituals and of course Faith in money and materialism, particularly as the book opens on the 1893 World’s Fair, which, as one commentator on that event said, was a dry run for America’s “consumer based society.”

Each of these manifestations appear to be represented by a major character. When the anarchist Webb Traverse shrugs and says “Sufficient unto the day” on page 96 he echoes Saint Matthew (6:34):

“Take therefore no thought for the morrow: for the morrow shall take thought for the things of itself. Sufficient unto the day is the evil thereof.”

Taken with the quote above where “against the day” is bookended by the word “wrath,” Webb stands as a polar opposite to the capitalist Scarsdale Vibe and the distinctly American optimism of the Chums of Chance who are surrounded by Christian symbols, including, on page 14, “Jacob’s ladder,” which is used literally as a ship’s ladder, but also is a well known symbol from the Bible (Genesis 28:12):

“And he [jacob] dreamed, and behold a ladder set up on the earth, and the top of it reached to heaven: and behold the angels of God ascending and descending on it.”

On page 250-252 Chum Miles Blundell has a vision and says:

“‘It wanted us to know that we, too, are here on a pilgrimage….When all the masks have been removed, it is really an inquiry into our own duty, our fate…As the Franciscans developed the Stations of the Cross to allow any parishioner to journey to Jerusalem without leaving his church grounds, so have we been brought up and down the paths and aisles of what we take to be the all-but-boundless world, but which in reality are only a circuit of humble images reflecting a glory greater than we can imagine – to save us from the blinding terror of having to make the real journey, from one episode to the next of the last day of Christ on Earth, and at last to the real, unbearable Jerusalem.’”

With all the talk of alternative universes in this book and clouds of apocalypse hanging over it, the fictive Chums – who do show up alternatively on page 214 as fiction despite interfacing with other “real” characters like Lew Basnight – seem to me to be something like King Arthur’s Knights of the Roundtable with perhaps Blundell as the virginal Galahad himself.

The Chums’ airship parallels the original “Quest of the Holy Grail,” (the original, not the Mallory) which is a tale of overt Christian symbolism, with its itinerant heroes who find themselves meeting challenges on a quest that is initially unknown to them. Ships play a large role in the original Quest too.

It’s interesting that Max said reading Pynchon is like reading T.S. Eliot because it is Eliot who led me to reading “The Quest for the Holy Grail” and Jessie Weston’s “From Ritual to Romance,” which relates the quest for the holy grail to its ritualistic roots and could also be for interesting ancillary reading alongside Against the Day.

Of course, picking a theme like I have could be dangerous territory because it seems to me that once you go mining in a Pynchon novel you start finding things where they may or may not really exist. The inscriptions that pop up everywhere in Against the Day are confusing, but also seem to point toward something. The Dante quote inscribed before (I think) New York City on page 154 “I AM THE WAY INTO THE DOLEFUL CITY” — which we know ends (frustratingly not here) with “Abandon Every Hope, All You Enter Here” — seems to be a signpost. Of the city that this inscription stands before, which underwent an “all-night rape,” Pynchon says in one of his occasional flourishes of sensuous writing:

“Out of that night and day of unconditional wrath, folks would’ve expected to see any city, if it survived, all newly reborn, purified by flame, taken clear beyond greed, real-estate speculating, local politics – instead of which, here was this weeping widow, some one-woman grievance committee in black, who would go on to save up and lovingly record and mercilessly begrudge every goddamn single tear she ever had to cry, and over the years to come would make up for them all be developing into the meanest, cruelest bitch of a city, even among cities not notable for their kindness.”

I say it’s a signpost because the story surrounding this city seems confusing as it pops out of nowhere and recedes into the background of the novel just as quickly, yet stands in contrast to the opening scenes of Chicago’s World’s Fair and captures the connection between a wrathful apocalypse and the Christian journey that Dante had just embarked upon in Canto III of The Divine Comedy, which like “Against the Day” reaches back into pre-Christian elements along its path and challenges Dante in his judgement of others. The passage in the Bible right after the one I quoted from Webb above reads:

“Judge not, that ye be not judged. 7:2 For with what judgment ye judge, ye shall be judged: and with what measure ye mete, it shall be measured to you again.”

AMS Bankruptcy Fallout

bwt cld day in aprL, clks 13

Wired: “Chaco is becoming one of the most popular mobile phone novelists in Japan. We don’t know much about her — except that she’s a twenty-something Pisces from Osaka — but we do know that she can spit out books faster than Danielle Steel. In the last 14 months, she wrote five novels, including her best seller, What the Angel Gave Me, which has sold more than 1 million copies to date.” (via Michael “Two Shades” Orthofer)

The Katrina Horror Lives On

Jenny D breaks some terrible news. In an ongoing New Orleans homicide epidemic, five people were recently killed in 14 hours. They included filmmaker Helen Hill and Paul Gailiunas, a doctor who helped low-income patients. (UPDATE: Paul did not die. My apologies. He was shot, but remains in stable condition.) I didn’t know these two, but Jenny vouches for them as good people and I believe her. The thought of people being murdered because that Bush and FEMA view New Orleans as a problem that will eventually go away is enough to make me want to destroy something.

The End of 2006

2006 ended many days ago and I sorta miss it. Like other years, it contained twelve months. And like other years, I feel compelled to serve up more Best Of lists, even if I don’t quite know where to start. The problem with any year is that you read too many books, listen to too many albums, attend too many shows, and watch too many movies. It doesn’t leave one exhausted, at least not while it’s happening. But at the end of the year, when all of this media consumption is tallied like a Central Park West socialite’s dry cleaning manifest, it becomes a bit too much to grapple with. And then some silly nostalgic force, operating like a peer pressure you can’t quite track, demands that all culture vultures offer Best Of pronouncements, generally in some predetermined and agreed upon format (Top Ten!). But by the time you get around to it, it’s too late. We’re in January. You should have been here back in December when we were really happening. When it was still 2006. When your opinion still mattered.

So instead of dragging out the posts I’ve been laboring on for the past few weeks, I’ll just let you fill it in. You can either print off this post and tape it to your refrigerator filling in the blanks. Or you can leave recommendations for everyone in the comments. That way, everyone’s happy and I won’t feel so guilty.

TOP TEN ALBUMS OF 2006

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TOP TEN MOVIES OF 2006

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